【Reading Notes】The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People

personal success

1. BE PROACTIVE

Proactive means taking the initiative, taking responsibility for one's past, present and future actions, and making decisions based on principles and values ​​rather than emotions or external circumstances. Proactive people are agents of change who forgo the passive victim role and don't blame others. Self-awareness, conscience, imagination and independent will, while creating change from the inside out, facing everything positively. They choose to create their own life, which is also the most basic decision of every human being.

• Do not complain
  • You can't attribute your unhappiness to the environment and others, but learn to be self-reliant.
  • Those who fail will only complain and relieve their emotions. Complaining is only a response, no countermeasures, and cannot solve any problems.
  • Successful people have already started to formulate countermeasures without reacting
• change and control yourself
  • Focusing on the things that can change is called being proactive.
  • Focusing on things that cannot be changed is called passivity
• Make decisions with comprehensive consideration
  • Employees, students, sons, bosses, teachers, and parents (love, environment, companionship, money) have great influence, and the decisions you make will affect others, so you should not only care about yourself, but consider all those affected people so that the right decisions can be made

2. Begin with the end in mind (BEGIN WITH THE END IN MIND)

All things are created twice—first in the mind, and second in reality. Individuals, families, teams, and organizations create visions and goals when planning any project, and shape the future accordingly, dedicating themselves wholeheartedly to the principles, values, relationships, and goals that matter most to them . Arguably the highest form of vision for an individual, family, or organization, a mission statement is the fundamental decision that dominates all other decisions. At the heart of leadership is creating a culture based on a shared mission, vision, and values.

• Have a clear goal in life.
  • Imagining death, who will be at the funeral, how you will be missed, what your eulogy will be. What is the impression you make on people, the good times you had with them, the joy you brought them
• Develop your life principles.
  • Use principles to make the right choice
  • Centering on wife, family, making money, work, entertainment, and material things, these single central principles, if the others are not taken into account, will fail.
  • Get into just one and you'll regret it.
  • at the expense of others. Family is sacrificed for money, entertainment is sacrificed for work, and health is sacrificed for entertainment.
  • people have various identities
• You have to know what you want to do before you can start.
  • Don't do things aimlessly, it will only waste time and make you more confused.

3. PUT FIRST THINGS FIRST

First things first, that is, the creation of substance, is the organization and practice of dreams (your goals, vision, values, and order of priorities). Secondary things don't have to be put first, and important things can't be put second. Regardless of urgency, individuals and organizations need to focus more on what matters, and most importantly, put it first.

• Make a list of all the things you need to do to achieve your goals.
• Put things in order, first things first.
  • Two attributes of things, importance and urgency
  • Important Urgent, Important Not Urgent, Urgent Not Important, Not Important Not Urgent
  • As long as the unimportant things are discarded, so first things first.
  • When important things cannot be done, entrust the important things to professionals

personal success summary

Principles of Personal Vision, Principles of Self-Leadership, Principles of Self-Management

1. First of all, you must have a correct attitude towards life, decide your own destiny, don't complain, and focus on what you can do.
2. Then set a clear life goal, establish your own principles for this life goal, and list the things to do.
3. Then set priorities for these things, starting with the most important things.
   If you do these three points and these three points become your life habits, you will become a personal success.

collective success

4. THINK WIN-WIN

Win-win thinking is a thinking framework and mind based on mutual respect and seeking reciprocity. The purpose is to share more opportunities, wealth and resources, rather than hostile competition. Win-win is neither self-interest at the expense of others (win-lose), nor self-interest at the expense of others (win-lose). Our work partners and family members need to think in terms of interdependence ("we", not "I"). Win-win thinking encourages us to solve problems and assists individuals to find mutually beneficial solutions, a sharing of information, power, recognition and rewards.

• There are four kinds of results when people get along with each other, and society is a competitive system
  • win-win (hard to come up)
  • You win and I pay (more)
  • I win you lose (more)
  • Double Indemnity (Divorce Proceedings, War, Crime)
• Abandon the Competitive Mindset
  • Think for yourself, but also for others
  • You cannot achieve your own success at the expense of others
• Win-win based on trust
  • Trust cannot be built in a day, it takes a long time
  • You said it was uncomfortable, but the doctor didn't continue to ask, and prescribed medicine for you right away, do you dare to take it?

5. SEEK FIRST TO UNDERSTAND, THEN TO BE UNDERSTOOD

When we no longer rush to answer, but instead understand and listen to others with sincerity, we can start real communication and enhance our relationship with each other. After the other party gains understanding, they will feel respected and recognized, and then let go of their psychological defenses and talk calmly, so that the two parties can understand each other more smoothly and naturally. Knowing the enemy requires benevolence, and understanding oneself requires courage. If the two can be balanced, the efficiency of communication can be greatly improved.

• Know each other thoroughly, and let the other party understand you thoroughly.
• build trust
  • Don't immediately stand on your own point of view to explain the other party's problems
  • Don't immediately comment on the other person's questions
  • don't give your advice right away
• establish trust
  • take the time to listen carefully to each other
  • Understand each other's situation
  • Empathize (not through logic, but through empathy) by expressing the other person's feelings in your own words

6. Synergy (SYNERGIZE)

Synergy is about creating a third alternative, not my way, not your way, but a third, better way. It's the result of mutual respect—not only getting to know each other, but even appreciating each other's differences, appreciating how each other solves problems and seizes opportunities. The strength of the individual is the basis for the comprehensive effect of the team and family, which can make the overall effect of one plus one greater than two. Practicing synergistic interpersonal relationships and teams will sublate hostile attitudes (1+1=0.5), do not aim at compromise (1+1=1.5), and do not stop at cooperation (1+1=2), they What is needed is creative cooperation (1+1>2).

• The cooperation between the two parties cannot be based on compromise, and cannot be compromised.
• We can't be married any worse than we can be alone
• Find a better way to cooperate and realize the possibility that one plus one is greater than two

Collective Success Summary

Principles of interpersonal leadership, principles of empathic communication, principles of creative collaboration

1. First give up the thinking of competition and think about the way of win-win
2. Then make sure that both parties get to know each other and build trust over time
3. In the end, we must find a creative cooperation method where one plus one is greater than two

self improvement

7. Keep updating (SHARPEN THE SAW)

"Constant Renewal" talks about how to constantly renew yourself in the four fundamental aspects of life (physical, spiritual, intellectual, social/emotional). This habit improves the efficiency of implementing the other six habits. For organizations, the seven habits provide vision, renewal and continuous improvement, so that the organization will not show aging and fatigue, and move towards a new growth path. For the family, Habit 7 upgrades the efficiency of the family through fixed personal and family activities, just like establishing a tradition and making the family change day by day, which is an example.

• Don't give up the first 6 habits
• Keep improving and create more success.
• keep updating
  • Body: healthy body, keep moving
  • Spirituality: meditation, walking into nature
  • Knowledge: reading and learning
  • Emotion: maintain communication with people

Self-improvement summary

The principle of balanced self-renewal.
A cycle of success through self-improvement.

1. First of all, we must stick to the habit and believe in the power of habit. Success is a habit, not a skill. Success learning strategies only have short-term effects.
2. Secondly, we must have confidence, believe in ourselves, cultivate personality, and achieve a happy life.
3. Finally, find a role model, get close to the successful ones, learn from the successful ones, and keep improving and updating.