Year-end summary?
It looks like the first time I do here year-end summary.
In fact, I was a few years before this day, in fact, I had the idea to write the voice of my end. But the words to the mouth, then swallow. Keyboard slowly crescendos hit a weak gradient, and even silent. At this time, this time the room was not a keyboard sound, really seems to be particularly quiet.
Looking back at the whole 2019, I found that I like to do a lot of things. But she looked up at the opposite wall, and feel I did not do anything.
In fact, I do not want to write these things, because I feel what I express myself too out of the negative energy. I thought of these feel good at a loss, not knowing really what to do.
In this Shenzhen five years
I was 90, another day, 90 collective bigwigs into the 30 mark. And I, short of 2 years. But I think I would have entered the 30 army.
I was 15 years from May to Shenzhen to find a month to find a financial entrepreneurial Internet companies, at that time the heat of the summer and did not let me retreat, did not feel hot, my heart just kind of forced less dry the blood of some big business. I was staying in a rented house students, Tiexi garden is light in Peng Chau. Rent 1200 - well expensive.
I'm looking for a job to Gushu from Baoan, Nanshan to and from Baoan, Nanshan to and from Lo Wu, I remember particularly impressed that, I sat for an hour from the subway to Lo Wu Peng Chau, then follow the map go to a small alley, discover how to find a company to be found, after some struggling, he went back. Shining sun at that time, for the first time there is a sad mood. But soon entered a state establishment brush looking for work.
Payroll was looking for work are probably around 5000-7000.
As mentioned earlier I found a start-up Internet company finance, the company gave me the salary is 4500, the size of the Week, the entry will have five insurance payments. I actually still a little ... after all meet in Changsha entry to pay five insurance payments pitiful really, really "welfare" ah.
Later, because overtime is very serious, and I think salary is too low. So I did less than a month I quit.
And then I found a dentist to do recruitment company, it is a start-up company. The company then gave me the offer is 5000, I said too little, to 6000. HR then the other side may say, so I'll entry.
To be honest, I am very happy, because for me it is really good 6000, and educated in Shenzhen itself is vulnerable (three) skills are not outstanding, is expected to be able to find salary from the heart is very good. 6000 Here is the Ref (direct boss found gold) social security fund are not.
Later, because our entire team because of "too amateur", what do have to look to see the boss, the boss to see the US group found a nice layout style app, let us overthrow redo, and then after one day and saw another good-looking app, and then perhaps we should add a little class to add a little change demand. Once the results presentation to the boss, very bad (in fact, each of us worked very hard a), leading to dissatisfaction with the boss of us, directly to a test fired. Later I was talking with my colleagues, bosses do not go on like this, the product has not come out (similar to cuss it), just passed by the boss to hear, so I told my boss saying we should open up. Old vigorously protect me, saying executive power, technology is very good and so on. Then after my boss told me to mention it, so I will not say the boss is not, then I heard, do not know why, I offered to leave, because I feel I have nothing in this sense I mean.
This time I came to Shenzhen already almost two months, two months I have not found a decent job. It really hurt my self-esteem, I think I can, but also work hard, and active learning, and will not so be it.
This time I have family from out of their own students to rent a. To reduce the pressure, I and two other classmates rented a one bedroom 1600 house in Overseas Chinese Village, because the environment is also good, space is also large, about 35 square meters. It is important to share 1600 three people actually okay. But not any of my current job, so it makes me very anxious.
Later, after referral from former colleagues, I entered into a finance company. The company can be said to me since the deep atmosphere best. Everyone feel special treat people good. I remember going to the interview, the surface is not very good, when I asked about the salary whispering 6000. The result was a HR phone company told me my salary 7000 ...
I am in the company for two years, the company used technology is very old, or .net4.0 + webform + ado.net. The company would not have us to research new technologies, as long as the system can be up and running on the line. Sometimes I put the fear of risk because of the transformation of opinions canceled (even if only a simple upgrade 4.5) Then I thought for a long time, I think I should leave to find a better fit for my company, can I have a growing company.
And then I went to a logistics company, which is in May 2017, just into the time is 13K, HR recruit me, told me that the company tax, 13K I could get my tax 12K. I heard, pleased bad (really, I was salary 9K, up 4K I am very happy). And .net technology stack is a relatively new technology, .net core + efcore, dapper to achieve CQRS, rabitmq do messaging middleware. The front is react, vue family bucket and then later angular (because better fit with abp.vnext)
In the past two years and eight months time, I happened had the original idea in mind shake a few things.
May 2017 my wife and licensing
2018 loans to buy a house in his hometown
May 2019 with the company declined to mention salary increase
November 2019 I once again mention salary with the boss (that is to say I want to go, the company did not pay rise almost 3 years, and said that next year did not have to rise if the company is to stay I think with a little action, I will not go ) the results of the company's practice with my thought completely different. I had already found out two companies, one 19k, a 20k, so long as the company gave me up a thousand pieces, I will not go.
The result was gone, with my colleagues finally got to know, to play together, to discuss technical, and then went away again.
28 years old, I started again looking for work.
2019 is the year of sentimental
I remember I used to be a very simply person, it can be said is a lack of salt of the earth. What is the kind of people who do not want to, think of what to do. I want to immediately resign resignation. Resigned, I would like to take some time off to rest for some time.
But now I find that I am not like that, and I do every step I feel I have been hesitant, I wonder what will happen after I did, what would I lose? I can not bare quit, I can not change jobs the rest.
I know the people and things around me became so sentimental, I got tired of my own. Sometimes I feel myself because of this feeling is particularly hypocritical. I want your efforts to become pure, the things around him do not be disturbed, but there are some voices have into their ears.
I looked back at my bookcase, I read this little book, I am always on the look again "in-depth understanding of computer systems", "design mode", "CLR via C #", "writing high-performance .NET", "Clean Code". My wife always laugh at me: "You're in the loading force, you have not seen a raise, ah," I make fun of the year, said "to cultivate the habit of reading, setting an example to the children so well."
Mom and Dad have been urging how we do not have a baby, do not be angry with me wife and older, children on the body is not okay.
I know, but that is not the time to have children, really could not afford, save money. 2020 my wife are 27 years old.
My wife and I sometimes lie in bed, there was a time to talk often, we quit IT, will be doing?
I do not know
But I know, all I'm trying to move forward momentum I had in mind.
New Year's Flag?
Sorry, I do not like the person standing in front of everyone Flag, not that afraid to fight face (her face is also normal -_-), but I do not like to say this in front of the public, in the heart to do it silently.
I wish you all continue to work hard in 2020, set a realization of their own flag.
I deleted deleted by this article, writing for three hours. While he wrote, and so my wife to work, yes, she is still at work.
If everyone brings negative energy, then I'm sorry.