Foreword:
The laws and principles that this book tells you must be practiced from the heart to be effective.
I hope that people who read this book will not deceive others in various ways.
In this book, what I want to tell people is just a new way of life.
1. If you want to get the most benefit from this book, you must have a basic condition, which is more important than any law or technique described in this book. You must have this basic condition, otherwise, even if you spend more time studying and researching this book, it will not be of any benefit. Advice that can do you good can also work wonders in your life.
So what is this magical condition? It is the urge that drives you to learn more, a burning desire to enhance your social skills.
How do you touch such a desire? That is to remind yourself at all times to make yourself understand how important these principles in the book are to you. You also make the following assumptions for yourself: If I can apply these rules freely in my daily life and work, then my life will be more colorful; this knowledge will help me achieve unexpected results in financial income. You have to say to yourself repeatedly every day: "The reason why I am popular with people, the reason why I can find happiness in life and work, and the reason why my financial income has increased is because I have learned how to get along with others."
2. Read each chapter quickly. Maybe you get a concept from it, so you want to read the next chapter. I suggest you not to do this. Unless, you're doing it to pass the time. If you are reading this book to enhance your skills in dealing effectively with people in your life and work, then please study this chapter carefully, because this is the most time-saving and effective way for you to achieve results.
3. When reading this book, you might as well stop for a while and think about what you are reading. You have to ask yourself, when and where I will use each of the suggestions in the book well.
4. When you read, please hold a red pen in your hand, so that when you read a suggestion that you think can be applied in your daily life, you can draw a line under the line mark. If you come across a suggestion that is very helpful to you, you can mark it next to this line. This book is full of lines and marks like this, which not only make your reading interesting, but also enable you to review effectively and benefit you a lot.
5. I know a man who works for a very large insurance company and has been a manager for 15 years. He goes over the insurance policy issued by the company every month, every year, in the sense that, in his experience, it is the only way he can remember the terms of the policy.
For two years, I spent almost all my energy writing a monograph on speeches. After that, I found that if I didn't read this manuscript over and over again, I couldn't remember his content well.
Therefore, if you want to learn something valuable for a long time from this book, you can't think that simply reading it once is enough. After you finish reading this book carefully, set aside some time for review every month, and put this book in a place that you can easily get it, so that you can read it at any time. To turn the principles in the book into a habit in your life, you must review them persistently and carefully.
6. Bernard Shaw once learned such a thing and said: If a person is only taught, he will not learn by himself. George Bernard Shaw was right in saying this, because learning is always a conscious process.
Therefore, if you want to apply the rules of getting along with people discussed in this book freely, you must apply them at the corresponding time. If you don't practice this, you will quickly forget what you have learned from this book. Because only when you flexibly apply the knowledge you have learned from books to your life and work, will it leave a deep impression on your mind.
You may find it difficult to apply what you have learned to your life and work. You're right, as I often feel that way myself. Even as I was writing this book, I also realized that it would be quite difficult to implement the suggestions in the book in the life I am used to.
I can cite the fact that when someone makes you feel bad, it is easier to criticize and blame than to actively understand the other person's thinking. We can easily find fault in others, but it is really difficult to find praise in others. In daily life, talking about what you need is more normal and natural than talking about what others need. Therefore, when you read this book, don't forget that you should not only acquire new knowledge from the book, but also cultivate your own new living habits by learning new knowledge. Because you are trying a new way of life that takes time and patience and practice every day.
So, read this book regularly and consider it a life manual for improving your relationships with others. Because at any time, you will encounter some special problems in your life, such as how to educate your children, how to let your wife understand your thoughts, how to satisfy an angry customer, etc. These are the things that you often encounter in life , when you read this book and try to implement it, maybe there will be a miracle.
7. This may be a risky attempt, that is, when your wife, children or colleagues find out that you have violated a certain principle when you implement a new living habit, you must pay 10 yuan as an excuse for your violation. fine.
8. Once, among the speakers in my study class, there was a manager in a very prestigious bank on Wall Street. He talked about a very effective method for self-improvement, which was once only accepted. A bank manager with a short formal education is now a very famous financial manager in the United States. He thinks the way he thinks determines everything he achieves now, and I wrote down what he said at the time, and here's what he did: "I have a journal of all my appointments. My family never takes my place Book an appointment on Saturday, they know that Saturday night makes me a time for self-reflection and thinking. Every Saturday night, I have to shut myself in the room alone, look through my appointment record for the week, and recall all Discussions and conversations, as well as various meetings, I kept asking myself: Did I do anything wrong that time? How should I improve myself, and what should I do correctly? What did I gain from that experience? ?This kind of introspection always makes me unhappy every Saturday, but I am amazed at the mistakes I have made. Now, this method of self-reflection works for me more than anything else I have tried It has to be effective, so I stick to this method. This method has allowed me to make great progress in decision-making ability and social interaction, and I have benefited a lot from it.”
Why not try this bank manager's approach? Check to see if what you have learned from this book has been applied in your life. In doing so, you will find yourself engaged in an interesting and important course of study, and you will find that your social skills expand and grow as you learn new knowledge.
Nine. On the basis of the above, you may wish to carry a notebook with you, and always record the effect of which suggestions you flexibly use in the book in your life and work, and write clearly what happened, the person and name you dealt with, and the The final result of something. It is interesting and meaningful to record these in the notebook, and it can motivate you to work harder in your future life and work.
You can get more out of this book by doing the following:
1. Cultivate a habit of deeply exploring the underlying principles of human relationships, and develop this habit to bring it into daily life and apply it flexibly.
2. Before reading the next chapter, read this chapter several times first.
3. As you read this book, stop often and ask yourself how you can apply each of the suggestions in the book to practice.
4. Add some symbols under the words and sentences that you think are of great help.
5. Treat this book as your life manual for solving problems encountered in work and life, and apply these principles to practice whenever you have the opportunity.
6. Self-reflection once a week, ask yourself what went wrong this week, where there is room for improvement, and how to improve.