Dining from novice to proficient

Would you sell your mother to a brothel?

You are already doing this.

statement

This article mainly refers to the video from Station B Video link

Since I am not good at socializing and have zero banquet experience, there are bound to be errors in the article. I hope readers will feel free to correct me and help people like me know how to eat correctly.

This article is mainly based on the drinking habits in Shandong. There are large differences across the country. The actual situation in your local area shall prevail.

1. Why treat guests to dinner?

1. The environment changes, and the identity changes accordingly.

In the office, you represent the interests of the company and deal with business matters. At dinner, you represent individuals and the topics are more relaxed.

2 Recognizing people by drinking wine

You can demonstrate a person's moral character and quality at a dinner party. Once the other person recognizes you, things will be easier to handle.

3 Eat people with soft mouths

Eating your food is equivalent to owing you a favor.

2. Preparation for the meal

1. Clarify the purpose of setting up a dinner party

If you are setting up a trap, you must be clear about what you want to do. You cannot just drink and forget to do business when you are drunk. The purposes of setting up a bureau include: asking for help, thanking others, helping others connect, and expanding contacts.

If you are the invited person, you should consider what the other person wants you to do and whether you have the ability to complete it. If not, you should refuse the meal, otherwise you will cause trouble for yourself.

2. Understand the characteristics of guests

We need to understand the following characteristics of the guest:
Position: The position of the other party is directly related to the probability of our affairs being completed: Mainly because the other party has different tastesRegion: Age is related to what is being discussed The topic, the choice of location, and the choice of accompanying guests (the age of the accompanying guest should be similar to that of the host and guest). If the other person is older, you can choose a quiet and elegant hotel; if the other person is young, you can choose a fashionable hotel. Age: The gender of the other party must be made clear, don’t take it for granted
Gender

3 How to design a guest list

Usually we don’t just invite the host and guests, but several accompanying guests, especially if we are not familiar with the guests.
3.1 Inviting guests’ peers (hang):
Don’t think that peers are enemies. Colleagues often have more topics to talk about and will not be left alone.
3.2 The position of the accompanist should be higher or lower than that of the guest:
The position of the accompanist is higher than that of the guest: to suppress the guest and prevent the other party from feeling that he is the best and the meal getting out of control.
The position of accompanying a guest is lower than that of the guest: give the guest a chance to show off, and don’t be too repressed.
3.3 The person accompanying the guest should be someone the guest knows well:
Well-known means someone the guest knows, has a certain influence and popularity, and is admired by the guest, but not necessarily They are all friends of the guests.
3.4 Both men and women:
3.5 When accompanying guests, you need to be eloquent and able to drink well:
Make the host and guest comfortable.
3.6 Have someone who can take control of the meal for you:
Invite a trustworthy friend who can take over for you in case you are in trouble.

3. How to choose a hotel correctly

Choosing the right hotel can help us save money.
Here are three ways to choose a hotel

1 Lot selection method

The transportation should be convenient and convenient when leaving.
Ensure guests save effort when arriving
Prevent guests from finding the hotel. Generally speaking, it is better to be within 30 minutes of the hotel. If guests are in a hurry, they can also stay nearby. choose.
There must be a parking lot.
Ensure that it is convenient for guests to leave
It is convenient for guests to go home and find a driver.
The choice depends on the individual
Whether the guest has a designated hotel.
If the guests are older, consider a hotel with a quiet environment.
If the guests are young, consider whether there are entertainment venues nearby.
Guests are short on time, so it is best to stay close to where they live.

2 Environmental Selection Method

2.1 The hotel should have a distinct personality, cater to the guests’ preferences, and highlight the guests’ personal style.
For example:
Distinguished guests can go to elegant high-end restaurants.
European style guests can eat Western food.
For those who like peace and quiet and are particular about the food, they can go to the farm restaurant.
For fashionable guests, there are trendy restaurants.
2.2 Hotels of different grades represent different levels of emphasis on guests.
Better hotels represent better services.
2.3 Help from the restaurant owner and chef
If we have a good relationship with the restaurant owner, it will improve our face and get extra help.
How to get help from restaurant owners?
Get to know the boss
You must be valuable and useful to the restaurant owner
Establish a relationship in advance and don’t improvise.
2.4 Sign and leave immediately after dinner
Paying well can also improve your own quality.
It is better to sign and leave directly than to pay the bill to show off.
You can deposit money at the hotel, or put a card.
2.5 Position the hotel style according to the type of guests
Leader: high style.
Colleagues/Friends: Very cost-effective.
Target: High emotional tone.
Business partners: For the first time of cooperation, choose a high-style hotel. After a long time, you can go to an ordinary hotel. Or, at the beginning of the cooperation, go to an ordinary business hotel, and if the cooperation is successful, go to a high-style hotel.

3 ways to choose cuisines

3.1 How to select signature dishes
Regional specialties will satisfy guests.
3.2 Opposite selection method
Take familiar people to unfamiliar restaurants, and take unfamiliar people to familiar restaurants.
3.3 Selection method of same hometown and same flavor
Understand the cuisines of different places in China, the eight traditional cuisines, and new cuisines (such as Northeastern cuisine).
Choose cuisine based on the guest’s hometown.
3.4 Delicious and cheap ways to order food

• You should have the menu in your own hands to avoid yin and yang menus (when ordering, the menu has a high price, and when you check out, the price is high).
• Avoid hidden consumption, whether there are tableware fees, service fees, corkage fees.
• Boycott the store for bullying customers, whether it is defrauding customers, selling overpriced wine while you are drunk, and whether you have the dishes you ordered when you check out.
• There are two types of dishes, one is large in portion and is used to fill you up, and the other is expensive and enhances your taste. You should have both.
  3.5 Prepare alternative hotels

4. How to invite

Prepare different words for five different groups of people.

1 leadership

Inviting leaders with respect is to gain recognition.
1.1 Purpose of invitation
Please lead the celebration.
Please ask for help.
Maintain a good relationship with leaders.
1.2 How to invite
In the name of asking questions.
Thanks to the leaders for their cultivation.
Communicate work experience and experience. Be careful to speak the truth at this time and do not talk too high.
1.3 Minefield
Let the reasons come naturally, and don’t ask just for the sake of asking.
Be fully prepared and understand the taste of the leader.
Actions must be based on your ability.

2 colleagues

Eli invites co-workers to help them respect you more.
2.1 Purpose of invitation
To increase understanding, gain respect, and have more opportunities for collaborative operations.
2.2 How to invite
Get a head start and understand the potential needs of colleagues. For example, you can say, I will treat you to dinner at noon. I know a few friends and your business There may be cooperation.
Borrow flowers to offer to Buddha, for example, my friend gave me a bottle of Moutai, but I don’t know how to drink, but I heard you do.
Step by step, it is suitable for those who have eaten before. For example, the restaurant I went to last time was really good. I heard that another one has opened recently. Let’s go and try it.
2.3 Minefield
Live within your means.
Pay attention to your status. If your status is not high and you often invite other colleagues to high-end restaurants, you will be resented.
Don’t talk about work during meals, don’t slander other colleagues, don’t gossip, and don’t complain about work.

3 subordinates

Invite your subordinates with affection and make them follow you more.
3.1 Purpose of invitation
Let him continue his efforts and be more loyal to himself.
3.2 How to invite
in the name of work problems.
In the name of achieving results at work.
3.3 Minefield
Name the purpose of inviting guests to avoid secret speculation.
Move with emotion, focus on the heart, express sincerity, and do not put pressure on subordinates.

4 customers

Invite sincerely to make him trust you more.
4.1 Purpose of invitation
Build trust and win more cooperation opportunities.
4.2 How to invite
Customers you are familiar with and have frequent business dealings with: Do not invite with low standards, ask the company’s senior management to invite them, or ask the senior management to attend the dinner.
Customers you are not familiar with but have business dealings with: If they are local, just ask the sales staff to organize them. If you are out of town, you can make a special visit.
Customers you don’t know but have potential business relationships with: You can invite a few people who are already our own customers to attend.
4.3 Minefield
Invite with sincerity and do not cheat.
No breach of contract, no breach of trust.
Think from others’ perspective and serve with heart.

5 opposite sex

Make an appointment with him politely and let him get closer to you.
5.1 How to invite
Find an excuse that is difficult for the other party to refuse:
Go with the flow: For example, ask the other party what they like to do on weekends, and the other party will tell you to see If you want to watch a movie, you can ask the other person to go out to watch a movie and have dinner together.
Offering advice: If we are not satisfied with the other party’s answer, we can put forward our own point of view and guide the other party.
Make use of the topic: You can say what new store has opened recently and what delicious food it has.
There is no other way: giving the other party the only option, it can be said that I just have a coupon in my hand.
It varies from person to person and from situation to situation:
The other party may have different identities and may be very busy, so you need to invite in advance or at home. Open invitations can be made to important people. People with free time can be invited at any time.
Reject formally after being rejected, reflect on yourself:
5.2 Minefield
Non-lover invitation: choose many people, bright ones place to avoid misunderstandings.
Important persons: treat them with dignity.
When a man invites a woman, it is best to arrive early.
Invite married people: Always in public.

5. The art of recognizing people at the beginning and quickly opening up the situation

1. How to warm up quickly when making greetings

1.1 As a host

Unfamiliar guests: To attract good friends
1 Start by complimenting the other person. If you are a woman, you can praise the other person’s clothing, appearance, bag, etc. , if he is a man, he can praise his female companion. Don't be too dramatic.
2 Talk about the weather and road conditions.
3 Introduce the topic with a humble attitude. For example, if you are late, you can say that I am slow-tempered, I am late, and I can’t change it no matter how much I do. If the other party is late, you can say: You came at the right time, we are bored.
4 When talking to strangers, do not touch privacy such as age, income, marriage, address, etc., and the tone should be polite.
Familiar guests: Let nature take its course
1 You can start from the past, for example, we have been three months No, has the child graduated? You treated me last time, I must treat you this time.
2 Pay attention to your words and attitude, do not use nicknames and nicknames excessively, and do not make excessive jokes.

1.2 As a guest

1 The guest follows the host's will, positions himself correctly, and listens to the host's arrangements.
2 Put down your posture. No matter how high your position is, you must put down your posture at dinner, otherwise you will isolate yourself.
3 Create topics, such as your clothes are so beautiful, where did you buy them? Which district did you come from? Are you Mr. Zhang’s comrade?
4. Toast frequently. If you don’t know what to say, you can toast more. This will easily attract others’ attention.

2. How to liven up the atmosphere when sitting down for dinner

2.1 What do you usually say before eating?

The host’s opening remarks:
Template: politeness - introduction - thanks
For example, thank you for your appreciation, It is a pleasure to come to a humble house. The food is not good and the hospitality is not good. Please forgive me if I am negligent. Then I will introduce the purpose of the dinner and the various characters. Finally, I would like to thank all the guests, especially the host and guests.

Note that you can drink or not at this time
Chat freely between the host and the guests, and between the guests and the guests
1 How to locate the other party’s points of interest< /span>

• Observe age: when you are older, talk about children, when you are younger, talk about work, when you are older, talk about health.
• Observe appearance: For example, people who wear sportswear will like to exercise, and those who have bracelets in their hands can ask for appreciation knowledge.
• Observe the circle of friends: Start with the other person’s interests.

2 How to deal with awkward conversations
First of all, you should calm down and understand that it is normal for people who are not familiar with each other to have no communication.
Secondly, bring the conversation closer by picking up food and pouring wine for the neighbors.
Third, have the courage to strike up a conversation
Fourth, find opportunities to engage in other people’s topics.
Fifth, use your own experience as a starting point.

2.2 How to alleviate embarrassment when a guest is late

• Make excuses for guests. For example, Mr. Zhang worked overtime for a meeting today and there was a traffic jam on the road. Please forgive me. Brother Wang lives too far away.
• Be the first to strike first, for example, if the guest is late, serve a drink first. When you've punished a guest, it's hard for others to say anything.
• I take responsibility for myself. For example, I always give two days’ notice to others and two hours’ notice to Zhang. It’s all my fault.
• To change the topic, for example, if Mr. Zhang is late, you can say: Mr. Li is so good at drinking. Mr. Zhang, you came just in time, please help me.

3. Get to know people at dinner and locate effective connections

There are usually five kinds of people at a dinner party, so different strategies need to be adopted
Smiling but hiding a knife
Characteristics: Keeping your head down, not making eye contact with others, maybe Going through ups and downs, similar to yours, or being overly enthusiastic about you.
Countermeasures: Maintain friendly relations on the surface, limit communication to official matters, and never mention personal privacy or other people’s matters.
Selfish
Characteristics: For example, fussing over everything when checking out, checking the bill over and over again, snickering when others make mistakes, and never reminding others to help.
Countermeasure: Don’t communicate. If such people do not harm others, it will not harm the dinner party, so ignore them.
Hiding deeply
Characteristics: A good person, a peacemaker, unwilling to share himself, but keen to understand others.
Countermeasures: Be cautious, don’t give others an excuse, prepare your rhetoric in advance, and don’t reveal your trump cards.
Telling tales
Characteristics: Quite active, enthusiastic about other people’s private affairs, keen on evaluating others, and even looking for trouble to highlight themselves. Glib tongue.
Countermeasures: Remain silent, do not express opinions about other people’s words, and do not accept words about yourself.
Acrimonious
Characteristics: Likes to be sarcastic and sarcastic towards others.
Countermeasures: Be kind and gentle. If the other person is sarcastic about you, don't take his words seriously. If the other person has no ill intentions, you can just go with what he says. If the other party is recalcitrant, you can take the initiative to fight back and let the other party explain what he said in front of everyone.

6. How to arrange seats

No matter what kind of table it is, the host always faces the door. If there is no door, it can also face the east. If the table is exquisite, some calligraphy and paintings will be placed on the host seat.

The principle of seating arrangements is that the host's companions should be spaced apart from the guests to facilitate taking care of the guests, toasting, etc., and not to let any guest be left out.

1 A round table seating arrangement that makes the host and guest feel respected

General dining table arrangement
![Insert picture description here](https://img-blog.csdnimg.cn/4fcdceab4e9e4174ab79af510f4e7282.png
As shown in the picture above, green represents the host and red represents the guest. The smaller the serial numbers of both parties, the more important the representatives are.
Green 1 is called the host, green 2 is the assistant, and red 1 It is the host-guest position.

This is the most common seat, but it may vary from place to place. The positions of green 1 and 2 and red 1 and 2 are usually the same. In some places, people with lower status have to sit closer to the door. (Except for assistants), if you don’t know the seating rules, it’s best to ask someone.

If there are people who are inconvenient to allocate positions, such as those with similar status and age, they can be placed in the red and green positions 5.6.7.8.

If it is not a particularly strict banquet, basically you only need to ensure that the main host, deputy host, guest of honor, and deputy guest are in the correct positions, and others can sit wherever they want.

The host does not necessarily have to be the host. If the position or age of the host is too different from that of the host and guest, you can find someone with a similar status and age to be the host. The host can sit directly opposite the host and guest, so that it is easier to observe the behavior of the host and guest.

In addition to cooperating with the main host to promote the atmosphere of the banquet, the assistant host is also responsible for picking up food and serving tea and water.

2 A square table seating arrangement that makes guests feel equal

Eight Immortals Table:

Long Table:

3 multi-table seating arrangements that satisfy everyone

If you can't sit at one table, you need to divide it into multiple tables.

Note that this is the arrangement rule for different tables. The most important guests are placed at table No. 1, and so on.
The principle is that the closer to the center, the more noble it is. If the number of rows is an even number, the "left" side of the two rows of tables in the center is always more important. The left here refers to the direction from which the guests look at the stage.

7. How to order food

1 How to order like a professional orderer

1.1 Who will order?
The host can order, the guests can order, the leader can order, the lady can order, take turns ordering (said it means not said), invite the orderer (the remnants of the little bourgeoisie, all sent to Gulag Hotel)
1.2 Principles of ordering

• Make the purpose of the banquet clear: The purpose of the banquet is different and the level of the banquet is different.
• Know how to choose dishes based on who you are inviting: If the person you invite is important, you must have hard dishes. If there are many men, you must order more to avoid not having enough. If there are many women, order some of the women’s preferred meals. If you have children, consider their preferences.
• Make a point when ordering: order special dishes.
• Consider the feelings of the person paying the bill: don’t order too much to avoid making the treater spend too much, just order one or two.

1.3 Tips for ordering dishes

• How to read the menu: Generally speaking, the first page of the menu is the specialties, and then the hot dishes, cold dishes, meat and vegetables, and staple food are arranged in categories. Don’t order too many of the same type of dishes. Be optimistic about the price. For dishes with strange names, you need to verify what they are (50 a cup is heartbreaking).
• The number of dishes to order should be appropriate: reference value: 4 people, 2 hot dishes, 1 cold dish, and 1 soup; 6 persons, 4 hot dishes, 1 cold dish, and 1 soup; 8 persons, 6 hot dishes, 1 cold dish, and 1 soup; 12 persons, 8 hot dishes, 2 cold dishes, and 1 soup. Generally speaking, the number of people eating -2 = the number of dishes.
• The order of serving dishes should be considered: cold first then hot, vegetables first then snacks, stir-fry first and then roasting, salty first then sweet, light first then strong, good dishes first. Note that these principles are likely to conflict with each other (design patterns are for those in the know), so just follow a few principles.

2 Five taboos you must avoid when ordering food

• religious taboos
• Personal taboos: Some people have taboos or have diseases that prevent them from eating certain foods.
• Local taboos: For example, Hunan people usually like spicy food, so we shouldn’t order too many sweets and be careful not to steal other people’s plates after eating.
• Occupational taboo: Drivers cannot drink alcohol.
• International taboos: If there are foreigners, learn about each other’s taboos in advance. Generally speaking, there are these points to note: 1. Avoid offal and fatty meat. 2. Avoid dishes with bones. 3. Avoid being too greasy or spicy.

3. How to match dishes when ordering

• Meat and vegetable combination: One-third of the dishes should be ingredients.
• Soft and hard combination: If there are elderly people and children, you should have something chewy.
• Color matching: The colors of the dishes should be a variety of colors.
• Flavor combination: sweet, sour, spicy and salty.
• Combination of hot and cold food: It is not easy to eat too much cold food.

8. Avoid the minefield of wine bureaus

1 Can I bring my own drinks?

Yes, but it must be well-known, or wine that you feel is good after drinking it, or wine that cannot be bought locally
Ask if a good hotel allows you to bring your own wine.

2. How to order wine if you bring your own wine?

2.1 Grade of wine
High-end: Moutai, Wuliangye, Gujing Gongjiu, Luzhou Laojiao.
Mid-range: Yanghe, Jiannanchun, Langjiu.
Low-end: Erguotou, Niulanshan.
2.2 Different seasons have different drinks.
Summer is suitable for beer, and winter is suitable for liquor.
2.3 Alcohol taboos

• Do not mix liquor with beer: the bubbles in beer will accelerate the absorption of liquor and increase the irritation of alcohol to the body.
• Do not drink beer when eating seafood: it is easy to form urinary stones.
• Don’t drink beer with improper side dishes: It’s best not to eat anything that tastes too strong when drinking beer.

2.4 Food and wine are not separated from each other
High-end: seafood + Maotai.
Mid-range: chicken, duck, fish + beer.
Low-end: skewers + beer.

3 How to pour wine for guests elegantly

3.1 How to pour liquor and beer
Ordinary friends are free to pour them, these are for outsiders.

• Pick up the wine bottle and face yourself, hold it 3/1 of the way to the bottle, pour the wine on the left first and turn it counterclockwise. If the target is on your left, pour the wine with your right hand, and vice versa. If it’s a family member, pour the wine for the elder first. If you are a customer, pour the wine for the host first and then the guests. If there is a lady, pour it for the lady first.
• Pour 90% full of beer and 80% full of white wine, which is convenient for toasting. When pouring beer, tilt the glass and let it flow slowly along the wall of the glass. Refer to the laboratory glass rod for drainage, which is commonly known as "drainage from the glass wall" (the stench is extremely bad).
• Don't take other people's cups randomly.

3.2 How to pour red wine

• With the label facing the guests, it should also be introduced along the wall of the glass. After pouring, quickly turn the glass upward half a turn to prevent it from flowing out.
• Pour 3/1 for brandy and wine, and 3/2 for white wine.
• Pour it first for the host, lady, or old man. If the guest of honor is a heavyweight, you can pour it for the guest of honor first to show respect.
• If you are a foreigner, pour the wine for the female guest of honor first, then the male guest of honor, and then clockwise.

4 Here’s to the opening drink

Note that only the host and the guest of honor have the right to toast everyone at once, and everyone else can only toast one by one.
4.1 Who will toast the first glass of wine?
The host will toast the first glass of wine. If it is a family dinner, the oldest person should serve.
Since it is a banquet, everyone has to give face.
4.2 What to say when toasting the first glass of wine
The theme of the banquet, the atmosphere, and the important guests. Refer to Section 2.1 of Chapter 5 of this article.
Be careful not to make your toast too long.

4.3 As a guest (a guest refers to someone invited by the host to accompany the drink), who should you toast the first glass of wine to?
You do not have the right to toast everyone at once, you can only toast one by one. .
Generally speaking, the first person to toast is the elder or the leader of the host.
You can thank the host for inviting you and meeting so many good friends.

5 5 taboos to avoid when toasting

5.1 No matter how big or small
Find your role, and don’t say anything you shouldn’t.
5.2 Endless
Don’t compete with others for drinks and toast one round after another.
5.3 No before or after
When toasting, distinguish the priorities and avoid toasting in front of the principal and the deputy. When it's your turn, toast again. After the main and deputy attendants have finished, toast in the order of 3, 4, and 5 attendants on the seat.
5.4 Difficulty controlling yourself
Don’t drink too much.
5.5 Acting crazy in the wine shop
Just like the title.

9. The process of toasting and the order of pouring wine

Toast

You don’t drink wine as soon as you drink it, but you start drinking it when you are almost done eating. Drinking on an empty stomach can easily make you drunk.
Note that depending on the circumstances of the dinner party, the format of toasting will be different in different rounds.

Opening drinks

In the opening speech by the host, you can drink or not drink, there are no hard and fast rules.

Stage 1:

When everyone has almost eaten, the host will toast the first round of wine. If the host is not good at speaking, you can ask someone with high moral character and respect from the host to toast on his behalf.
The order of toasting:
Option 1
1. The host toasts the host, the guest 2. the host (the host and the host may be the same person) ) Respect the guest of honor 3. The deputy attendant should toast the guest of honor. The assistant attendant should toast a glass of wine immediately after the chief attendant finishes the toast. 4. The guest of honor toasts the host. 5. The guest of honor toasts everyone. If the guest of honor has a higher status, after toasting the host, you can Immediately toast everyone once. If you are of similar status to the host, it is best to take turns toasting one to one, with the host accompanying everyone. From then on, this is the end of the first round of toasts.
Plan 2
In Shandong, the first round of wine is divided into two glasses. Please note that you are not allowed to clink glasses during the first round, just click on the table. .
When the host and deputy escort lead the party, they should also respect the host and guest first.

The first glass of wine is usually led by the host and the assistant. The first glass of wine is usually finished in 4, 6 or 7 sips. Usually the host takes 4 sips and the assistant takes 3 sips. If there is an escort, you can press Assigned 3/3/1.

The second cup of wine will be led by the assistant host instead.

Stage 2:

When the first round is over, it enters the "circle toasting session", that is, the main host and the deputy have to start from their right side and have a drink with everyone, and drink a drink after each toast. Therefore, the amount of wine consumed by the host and deputy should be large enough.
Toasts are usually made in a clockwise or counterclockwise direction. When toasting, you should also toast the person of high status first.

When the master and auxiliary companions lead the circle, the guests can return the favor. At this time, the master and auxiliary companions cannot shirk.

Stage 3:

Toast freely. At this time, you can toast each other. Note that you should also wait until the person who is higher than you has finished toasting before you go to toast with the person who is higher than you. Among the people of the same level, you can toast to whomever you like, or if you don’t like someone, just toast. Pour him wine.

Stage 4:

At the end of the banquet, everyone has a drink together.

Toast rules

1 It is your turn to toast only after the person with a higher position than you has finished toasting
2 After the previous person toasted, the next person should wait slowly before toasting, do not toast immediately , the time difference can be noted in the time difference between two people toasting.
3 Don’t toast while the guest of honor is chatting, but have basic winks.
4 Not all dinner parties require taking turns to toast. If the guest of honor cannot drink enough, you can offer to let him or her drink water instead of wine.
5 You have to stand up to toast in formal situations, but you don’t have to stand up in informal situations.
6. When drinking, raise the glass first, and then raise the glass again after drinking. If the glass is empty, tilt the glass to indicate that it is gone.
7 When toasting, raise the glass with both hands and place the bottom of the glass with your left hand.
8 When toasting, your glass should be lower than the other person’s glass to show respect.
9 When toasting, you should say a toast.

pour wine

1 If the hotel has a waiter who pours wine, just ask the waiter to pour it, and be polite.
2 The order of pouring wine is starting from the guest of honor, rotating counterclockwise, and finally pouring for yourself.
3 When pouring wine, you should stand on the right side of the target, with your right hand in front and your left hand behind. You can also stand on the left side, but you need to change the front and back of your hands (where you stand on the target) Side, the hand is in front), you cannot pour wine with your backhand, because pouring wine with your backhand is the way to pour wine to the dead (it’s a lot of trouble).
4 Fill the small cup to full, fill the large cup to seven or eight tenths, and fill the extra large cup to one third.
5 Pour it first for the guest of honor, then for the deputy guest, then for the host, and then pour it counterclockwise from the right side of the guest of honor (most information says it is counterclockwise, but some information says it is counterclockwise) Said clockwise, some places are random, it is recommended to ask the staff in the hotel).
3 If there is no waiter, the first round of wine will be poured by the host. After the first glass of wine is finished, the host and assistant

10. How to Drink and Refuse Drinking

1 How to toast someone so they won’t refuse

1.1 Three ways to toast

• Wenjing: For example, at the beginning of a banquet, the host proposes a toast after his opening remarks. At this time, you can toast accordingly.
• Mutual Respect: After the host proposes a toast to the guest, the guest immediately proposes a toast in return. The owner cannot refuse at this time.
• Reciprocal toasting: Guests toast to each other. This is an equal way of toasting. The toasting party needs to rely on a reason to toast. If the person being toasted cannot find a reason to refute, he will drink.

1.2 How to make a toast
Note that the principle of toasting is not to force the person to make things difficult. If the person being proposed successfully refuses, forcing a toast will make the atmosphere very awkward.
You can play some mini games to liven up the atmosphere.

• Guessing charades: Play charades, prepare some charade cards, draw them randomly, and drink the ones you can't guess within one minute. You can use WeChat applet.
• Idiom Solitaire: Just like the title.
• Public opinion guidance method: Mention something that everyone knows and guide public opinion to a certain person. If everyone thinks he should drink, he must drink.
• Cleverly devise strategies: you can flatter and kill the opponent.

2 How to drink with a poor drinker

2.1 How to accompany a teetotal drinker
If you don’t drink, pour more wine for others and drink tea yourself. Be proactive and don't give others the chance to toast you.
Pretend to be drunk and say some outrageous things to make everyone laugh.
2.2 How to accompany someone who drinks too little alcohol
The method is the same as above.
If the other person knows that you are a light drinker and has no good intentions, you can just put the glass away and politely tell the other person that you are not in good health and cannot drink.

3 How to say no to alcohol

Five tips based on wine:

• Change the subject
• No drinking while driving
• There will be a meeting in the afternoon
• Lie about taking medicine
• Feeling unwell: Pretend to be so, cover your waist, head, or stomach.

4 How women drink alcohol

• Preserve your strength and strike first to gain the upper hand: talk more and persuade others to drink more. Persuading people to drink means to persuade others to drink. If they drink too much, they will not drink with you. For example, if you don’t drink, you are not a man (you are a woman).
• Find people who are weak in drinking to attack: if you drink others down, they will think you are not easy to deal with and will not dare to persuade you to drink easily.
• Pretending to be pitiful: Only useful for new friends.
• If not, then change your face

11. Identify people and actions not to be done through actions

Drinking yourself drunk will only make others look down on you.

1 How to see through the other person’s mind

1.1 Through actions

• Not looking up or looking at others: looking down on others.
• Looking at people from the top down: Likes to dominate others.
• Looking at others: hoping to get more information from others.
• Focused eyes and gentle expression: conquered by the opponent's ability.
• The eyes are sharp and the expression remains unchanged: powerful, cold and ruthless.
• Staring into the room and nodding slightly: Very controlling, very stubborn, and will not listen to other people's opinions.
• Hands on hips: posture when giving orders.
• Pointing your index finger at someone else means you are competitive.
• Tap someone on the shoulder: Tap from the side to express approval. Photographed from the front and above to express contempt.
• Put your fingers together into a pyramid shape: you think you are right and strong.

1.2 Through eating phase

• Taste it lightly: conservative, unwilling to try, steady.
• Feng Zhuan Can Yun: bold, cheerful, enterprising, grumpy, competitive (me, please praise me more).
• Chew carefully and eat slowly: Rigorous, small-minded, have few friends of the same sex, the advantage is that you are reliable in doing things.
• Overeating: Being straightforward and not caring about other people's feelings.

1.3 By drinking preference

• Good Baijiu: Can't do without Baijiu, good at sociability, and very concerned about other people's evaluation of themselves. Usually loved by subordinates, but not on good terms with superiors.
• Good Beer: Don’t care about small things and like to teach friends.
• Good wine: introvert, idealist.
• Good champagne: has high requirements in life and does not care about small things.

1.4 Expression through drunkenness

• Talking non-stop when drunk: Normally, I am a nice person, but I talk a lot because I have been suppressed for a long time.
• Dozing off after being drunk: Weak-willed, likes to make promises, regardless of whether they can be completed. It is easy to back down when faced with opposition.
• Exaggerated movements when drunk: strong resistance, low self-esteem, easy to offend others (me, but I don’t care).
• Crying when drunk: Romanticism, fear of being cheated.
• Repeatedly toasting when drunk: stubborn, seemingly gentle, easy to escape.
• Singing while drunk: Strong self-confidence.
• Provocative to others when drunk: usually docile, but stubborn at heart, unable to accept others looking down on themselves.
• Being dejected after being drunk: being very serious about the goals you set, letting things take their own course if you don't like the goals, and not putting in more energy. I usually have high mood swings.

1.5 Cup holding habits

• Grasping the bottom of the cup: Emotions are changeable, joyful, and concerned about the opinions of others.
• Grasping the middle of the cup: Strong adaptability to the environment, not easy to reject others, a pleaser personality.
• Grasping the top of the cup: informal and optimistic.
• Smoking while grabbing a cup: personality, strong self-esteem, suitable for personalized work, and likes to be alone.
• Will shake the cup when drinking: outgoing, easy to meet and fall in love with.
• Holding cup with both hands: very introverted. Others need to take the initiative.
• Holding cup between pinky thumb and thumb: artist, self-centered.
• Holding the cup ear tightly: flamboyant, likes to attract attention, and goes its own way.
• Little finger raised: Introverted, neurotic, sensitive, you need others to ask questions before you feel others care about you.
• The little finger rests on the bottom of the cup: you are irritable about life, insist on your own opinions, and would rather be deficient than indiscriminate.

2 How to win hearts easily

2.1 Pay attention to expressions and movements

• Don’t face the person head-on: talk at an angle.
• Don't laugh too hard: it's easy to make others wary.
• Don’t touch your face: Touching your face is a sign of lying.
• Don’t hold your head in your hands: this will make others think you find the topic boring.
• Don't close your eyes: Closing your eyes is a sign that you don't like the other person.
• Don't shake your legs
• Don't lean back
• Don't put your hands behind your head or under your buttocks: this is a sign of superiority.
• Don't look at the time and check your nails: this is a sign of indifference.
• Don't scratch your head: This is a sign of lying.
• Don’t grab the collar: it looks immature
• Don't slump your shoulders: a straight back helps you project confidence.

12. How to enter the game if you are not good at socializing

1 9 Tips for Active Scores

• Sincere compliments: Sincerity is always a must-win, and compliments should be specific.
• Charming prank: You can make fun of your friends.
• Blending solemnity with humor: talking about serious topics in a relaxed way.
• Ask ridiculous questions and answer cleverly: look at the retards more often.
• Bring some props: magic tricks, musical instruments, for example.
• Create some innocuous little loopholes: the purpose is to attract attention, and then you can shake off the baggage after everyone notices you.
• Depreciate yourself appropriately: Only masters can use it. Depreciation is to suppress the desire to promote yourself first, and when others laugh, you can promote yourself again.
• Deliberately exposing "shortcomings": deliberately careless, deliberately pretending to be drunk, deliberately indifferent, be careful not to attract others with your usual personality.
• Don't worry about "hurting" the other person: only for good friends. Be careful not to use prejudice or malice.

2 3 tips for treating dumb mouth

• Dare to speak and observe carefully: You must dare to speak. If you don’t know what to say, first observe what others are saying and dare to express your own opinions.
• If you don’t know what to say, talk about yourself first: For example, you can say: I came from XXX today and was stuck. Then based on the other party’s answer, extract a keyword for communication.
• If you don’t have a topic to look for: you can look at the recent news.

3. Catch other people’s words in one move

Humor, be humorous enough, watch more talk shows, and practice more.
For example, if the waiter does not close the door when serving food, he can say to others while serving food: Lend me 100 yuan, and I will hire someone to close the door.

Thirteen How to ask for help

1 Seize the opportunity

• when the other person is in a happy mood
• When the other person has free time
• When the other party’s chat topic is close to what we need help with
• Take the initiative to create topics: For example, if you want others to help your children go to school, but others are talking about business issues, you can say: Mr. Zhang, if your career is so successful, your family must be very happy.

2 Let the other party take the initiative to help

• Pretending to be a bear: If you are asking for help, don’t show off too much of yourself and promote others more.
• Pretend to be awesome: Show that you are professional in the relevant field to gain trust.
• Pretending to be crazy: Pretending to be drunk and saying things that you cannot say under normal circumstances. For example, if you want to flatter someone, you can say that it is absolutely fine to leave this matter to you. Others say that you are brotherly and upright, and you will never stand idly by when your brothers are in trouble. If others want to reject you, you can say: Brother Zhang, do you know why I don’t beg others but just you? Because you are Brother Wang’s good brother and he believes you can help me. You are not giving Brother Wang face by doing this. . Note that Brother Wang must have a certain degree of influence.

3 How to deal with ambiguous answers

• Roundabout inquiry: We can say: I understand what you mean. You still need to ask your superiors for instructions on this matter. I am waiting for your good news. If the other party says that I can make the decision, then that’s okay. If they say that they still need to ask for instructions, that’s not okay. If the other party is the person in charge and says they need to discuss it, then it’s a sign of failure.
• Direct inquiry: For those who are generous, you can directly say: Brother Li, you are rejecting me. The other party will give you a direct answer.
• Method of provoking generals: You can say: Listening to Brother Zhang’s words being so implicit, it seems that Brother Zhang’s power is limited.
• Use retreat to advance: You can say: We are good brothers. No matter how difficult it is for me, I can't embarrass you. I'll look at it and find someone else later.

4 How to deal with rejection

• Xiao Yi Li Wei: If the other party has not thought carefully, we can analyze the consequences of the other party's rejection, and we can praise the other party's talents before starting.
• Turn the reason for rejection into a reason for asking for help: If the other person’s reason is very good, we can praise the other person’s reason and then find an excuse to use the reason.
• Take advantage of the other person's interest: go wash their feet.

14. Say goodbye to awkward chats

1 Dinner jokes for chatting

1.1 Prepare in advance
Prepare three topics that are suitable for everyone at the current meal, and prepare four common topics as backup.
1.2 How to accumulate jokes

• Pay more attention to things in life
• Write down something interesting: it doesn’t have to be funny, it could be something interesting you heard from someone else.
• Read more news, books, etc. to extract interesting jokes
• Practice more frequently

2. Grasp guests’ emotions

2.1 Praise the guest
In the initial awkward chat, compliments can quickly build a relationship.

• Be sincere
• It varies from person to person: for example, for young people, it is said to be young and promising; for middle-aged people, it is said to be well-informed and experienced; for scientific researchers, it is said to be knowledgeable and hardworking; to businessmen, it is said to be flexible and wise in making money.
• Don’t make things out of nothing: base your compliments on what you see, such as their home decoration, their pets, their artistic taste.
• Be different: If someone else compliments the other person on one point, you should say something else.
• It should be connotative and layered: don't just keep it superficial, you can talk about the other person's complexion, aura, very manly, gentle heart, etc.

3 What to do if someone makes things difficult for you in public

Don't directly accuse the person who makes things difficult, as this will make you appear uneducated.

• Please enter the urn: also introduce the other party into the same situation, and then we can escape.
• Counterattack with the same thinking: Use the other person’s logic to respond to the other person.
• Dazhi Ruoyu: Pretending not to understand.
• Use rhetorical questions skillfully: When faced with acrimony, don’t answer the other person’s question, ask directly.
• Turn passivity into initiative: Pretend to be well-intentioned first, relax the other party, and wait for the other party to lower their guard before counterattacking.

4 How to point out other people’s mistakes

Don’t believe that you will be happy if you smell it, no one likes to be criticized.

• Pay attention to attitude
• Be measured
• Just click on it
• Avoid third parties
• Discuss matters as they are

15. How to answer topics you don’t like

1. Resolve difficulties

1.1 Why are we being challenged?
The other party wants to show their power and thinks we are easy to bully.
We have offended each other before.
1.2 How to deal with it

• Make excuses: Don't confront the other party head-on. Since the other party wants to make things difficult for you, he must be ready. You can change the subject or find a shield. For example, if someone deliberately gets you drunk, you can say: Brother Wang is my best friend. You and Brother Wang drank less today, so you need to drink more. The premise is that Brother Wang must have a good drinking capacity and have a good relationship with you.
• When you want to suppress something, you should first express it: first affirm the other party's words, and then say "but".
• Rejection + Respect: Refuse directly when necessary, with a firm attitude, but when refusing, be polite, don't be hostile, and don't ruin the atmosphere of the banquet.
• Equivalent exchange: For example, if the other party wants to play truth-telling with you, you can ask the other party to tell the truth together. (Don’t really tell the truth)
• Repeatedly drink in small amounts: Keep toasting to the other person. You can drink less each time, but be determined not to drink more. The other person is an idiot, so there is no need to sacrifice your body.

2. Transfer embarrassing private topics

• Stay calm: don't panic, don't spoil the atmosphere of the wine party, and don't say inappropriate things.
• Forced slowdown: A forced reminder is required, for example: Everyone is happily eating and drinking tonight. If anyone talks about this again, please don’t blame me for turning your back on others.
• Ask someone to put the brakes on: Ask an influential person at the dinner for help and ask him to stop the conversation from continuing.
• Don't usually talk about your privacy.

3. Respond to harassment with high emotional intelligence

Dangerous Edge Method
We say whatever the other party is afraid of.

• The company's top leader harasses us: Use the company's image to fight back. The boss is most afraid of damaging the company's image.
• Direct bosses harass us: warning the other person that they may lose their job, or informing the other person’s family.
• Colleagues harass us: clearly tell the other person that we have a partner, and tell other people in the company about it.
• Customers harass us: clearly tell the other party that they do not accept unspoken rules and bring the matter to the other party's company.

16 How to Checkout

1 Details you must pay attention to when checking out

• Pay attention to your attitude towards the waiter.
• Check your bill before paying.
• Beware of pay-to-order traps: 1. False discounts: Specials cannot be discounted. 2. Malicious fraud: Deliberately overcharging. 3. Vague prices: There is no price or only part of the price on the menu. 4. Only current prices: Some menus have current prices. That is the current price, it will not be this price when you check out.
• Remember to ask for an invoice.

2 Under what circumstances should you take the initiative to settle the bill?

• Friends come to visit.
• Ask someone for something.
• Participate in a blind date dinner as a man.

3 Those meals must not be paid for

• Someone is showing off at the bar.
• Others want something from you.
• The woman goes on a blind date.
• Fair-weather friends.

Seventeen Drunkenness and Treatment

1 How to deal with drunk guests

• If the guest is staying in a hotel, the organizer or relevant personnel will send him back to the hotel and ask the hotel to prepare honey water (Skeleton King will leave envious saliva), vomit buckets and towels. If a guest falls asleep and cannot lie down to prevent the guest from choking himself when vomiting, inform the waiter to pay attention and then leave.

• If you ask a taxi driver to take you home, inform the other person's family in advance where to pick him up, give your phone number to the taxi driver on a piece of paper, and wait for the guest to call to confirm when he gets home.

• Make sure that the guest's belongings are intact and keep them for you if necessary until they sober up before returning them.

2 Under what circumstances should you send guests home in person?

• Organize your own meal
• Economic strength allows: the guest's home may be in various places, and the return trip may be far away.
• Guests are extremely important
• The guest is extremely drunk
• Very good relationship
• Old and highly respected

3 How to sober up after drinking too much

• Vinegar and white sugar: 60 mg of vinegar, 20 g of white sugar, add a small amount of warm water
• Vinegar, brown sugar and ginger: 60 mg of vinegar, 20 g of brown sugar, 6 g of ginger, add water and boil