In 2020, the epidemic began.
In 2022, the third year of the epidemic.
2022, the third year of graduation.
At the end of every year, I always think about writing something.
To record the past year, bid farewell to the past and start a new year.
But, every year, no action is taken.
I took a year and got through 2022.
It will take another year to spend 2023.
Either way, it seems like I should stop.
Take a few days to reflect on yourself.
Summarize well and plan well.
Review the past and summarize the gains and losses.
Plan the future and set sail.
The past cannot be admonished, but the coming can still be pursued.
"This Jiugongge looks like a person."
"People are stepping on three foundations, including health, finances, and social interaction. You can't do anything without health, and you can't do anything while lying in a hospital bed. You can't do anything if you don't have money. Eating and drinking, life, old age, sickness and death, who doesn't need money? You can't do without friends, it's so pitiful to be alone forever.
"What people hold in their left and right hands is the balance between work and life. If you grasp it with both hands, both hands must be hard."
"There are three kinds of enjoyment on top of a person's head, the enjoyment of growth in the learning process, the enjoyment of experiencing breakthroughs, and the enjoyment of relaxation and entertainment."
1. Good health
The body is the capital of revolution.
I understand that there is a truth behind this sentence: good health is a means, not an end.
These four sources are: Will, Mind, Emotion, and Physical Energy.
Good energy = abundant physical fitness + positive emotions + focused thinking + firm will.
1.1 Will
Aristotle once said: The purpose of life is to obtain happiness.
Whether it is NLP logic level, or Maslow's hierarchy of needs theory.
The highest level of life points to "doing something useful to others", that is, altruism.
Helping others is the best self-interest.
Obtaining happiness through altruism is the way I currently understand to obtain happiness.
2022, in the ongoing writing process.
I seem to have found the altruism I was after.
Become a better version of yourself by building and sharing knowledge; at the same time, make something useful to others.
Build and share knowledge to become a better version of yourself comes from the man in charge of the two tools.
One is Yuque’s product manager, Jing Tong. He once said a sentence, to the effect that he uses Yuque to build and share knowledge.
The other is Shao Nan, the founder of flomo. He said: Accumulate your own knowledge assets and become a better self.
Later, in the process of continuous output.
Inadvertently, I linked these two sentences together.
It becomes: building and sharing knowledge to become a better version of yourself.
I hope to become a better self through the construction of self-knowledge.
Then through sharing, inspire more people and let more people become better selves.
In this way, you can benefit yourself and others.
Therefore, building and sharing knowledge has become a way for me to achieve happiness.
Every time I think about it, I get super excited.
In 2022, I have been continuously outputting life notes and life meditations.
In 2023, I will hold the mentality of lifelong learning and learn from everything.
Whether it is reading, listening to lectures, stealing teachers, practicing, or teaching and writing.
I will use the emotional touch method, and treat every small touch point as an opportunity for me to learn and grow.
When encountering difficulties, "building and sharing knowledge, becoming a better self" and "making something useful to others" will become my firm beliefs and guide my way forward.
The meaning of life should be different in different stages of life.
I also hope to explore more possibilities and meanings of life.
1.2 Thinking
Thinking at the level of physical health puts more emphasis on the ability to focus.
By focusing, getting things done, perfect.
When it comes to focus, we have to mention deliberate practice.
Clarify goals, stay focused, get feedback, and get out of your comfort zone.
In terms of goals, in addition to meeting the SMART principle.
My new understanding still needs to be done: first things first, less is more.
Reduce desires, time is limited, and only do one most important thing.
After doing this, any other things you do can be regarded as earned.
Only with this mentality can we maintain patience and practice long-termism and valueism.
Sustained focus is actually entering a state of flow.
How to enter flow, according to my practice, there are three aspects.
First, there must be a deadline.
DDL is primary productivity, this is true.
Only by giving yourself proper pressure can you stimulate your potential.
Second, the target difficulty is slightly higher than the ability.
In fact, it means stepping out of the comfort zone and doing things in the stretch zone.
Third, there is feedback.
This feedback is divided into internal and external.
Internal feedback is more about whether you have grown.
External feedback focuses on the benefits or honors brought to oneself.
I personally tend to focus on internal feedback, when internal.
It is easier to achieve "not to be happy with things and not to be sad with oneself".
Because it is good for us, we are more likely to be interested.
When you are interested, it will be easier to last for a long time.
In 2022, I can basically enter flow quickly in writing, reading, and work.
But when working overtime, or at four or five o'clock in the afternoon on weekdays, I obviously can't concentrate.
Therefore, in 2023, deliberate practice of "deliberate practice" itself is required.
1.3 Emotion
Emotion here refers more to emotions, including joy, anger, sorrow, fear, anxiety, depression, sense of nothingness, and spiritual sensitivity.
Only when you have a peaceful mood and a strong heart can you do things better, and do extraordinary things with a normal mind.
The ancients said: "Don't be surprised by favor or disgrace, just watch the flowers bloom and fall in front of the court; if you don't care about going or staying, just follow the clouds and clouds in the sky."
At present, the better method I have come into contact with is the ABC theory of emotions.
Can reflect on the generation of emotions very well, and distinguish between emotions and facts.
In 2022, my mentality will be relatively peaceful, and there will be no major negative emotions.
In 2023, the overall goal is to maintain a peaceful mind and actively deal with negative emotions.
Prevent the extreme emotions of "smug" and "all hope is lost".
Put it into concrete action:
- For various emotions, we must establish our own coping methods and fine-tune management
- Add the emotional management part to the life notes, reflect on yourself, and make your emotions stable
- Manage emotions in practice, keep practicing
- Sometimes emotions are more sensitive and easy to ruminate, so write them down in time and resolve them in time
1.4 Physical fitness
Physical fitness includes exercise, sleep, and diet.
In terms of sports, I currently play basketball 3 times a week and run 2 times a week, which is generally good.
In terms of sleep, I have been able to go to bed early and get up early, but my sleep at noon is still not deep enough.
In terms of diet, although I try to mix meat and vegetables as much as possible, but because I am lazy.
There are fewer styles of dishes.
In 2023, the overall goal is to develop good exercise habits.
Pay attention to some official health data.
Cultivate your own scientific exercise, sleep, and eating habits.
2. Financial management
Wealth is the realization of cognition
I know very little about financial management.
At the beginning of 2022, after reading some books on financial management, I began to blindly choose and buy funds.
As a result, I lost 235.3 in the end, so it would be better to honestly put it in Chaochaobao of China Merchants Bank.
Meng Yan, the founder of Youzhi Youxing, said that if you can’t see clearly the logic of making money behind an investment, then don’t invest.
Just like, if you don't know who the idiot is at the poker table, often you are the idiot.
Insufficient cognition makes it difficult to rely on investment to make money.
Even if you make money by luck, you will lose it by skill.
Therefore, the main goal in 2023 is to establish awareness of financial management.
At the same time, remember that money will be earned sooner or later, don't rush.
It is mainly through the control of money to maintain one's own living needs, so that you can think about longer-term things more calmly.
If you encounter problems with your own living security, you will inevitably become short-sighted.
Including the following aspects:
- Follow what you know and do, learn systematic knowledge, establish a cognitive framework, don't be greedy, just follow a company
- Inventory your own property every week, so that you know what you have
- Cultivate your own understanding of economics through financial awareness
3. Interpersonal community
Be grateful, be in awe, be strict with yourself and be lenient to others.
This sentence is my WeChat signature when I was in college.
Looking back on me at that time now, I was more irritable and sensitive, and I was prone to be depressed for a long time because of some small things.
Interacting with people is not very smooth, and I fall into my own world.
Recently, I was reading the book "Methods of Communication" by Tuo Buhua, which mentioned some communication methods and many scene-based communication methods.
It is worth learning and practicing.
The interpersonal community I understand is everyone except family members.
Including strangers (netizens), lovers, classmates, friends, bosses, colleagues, subordinates, superiors, bosses, etc.
In 2023, the main goal is to be a humble person (sincerity, gratitude, awe).
Key actions include:
- Read the book "Methods of Communication", and only read this book related to communication.
- When dealing with interpersonal relationships, actively use communication methods
- Sincerity: Do not deceive others, credit is very important
- Gratitude: say thank you more, and give some real, behavioral thanks
- Awe: Respect everyone, don't be arrogant, arrogant
4. Work and career
No matter how the outside world changes, one's own growth is always the most stable capital. After ten years, I realized from the bottom of my heart (not just from my head): the ultimate purpose of work is to please myself through growth. Of course, there are many ways to please yourself, not necessarily through work, and practice is everywhere in the world.
The above passage is from an article written by Mr. Liu Jin.
I agree with this point of view very much. Work is a way of exercising yourself. The purpose is to make yourself grow and make yourself happy.
Work is ultimately for yourself, not for the company.
Creating value for the company is a natural result after you get better.
Tuo Buhua mentioned a sentence in "Methods of Communication": What everyone pursues in his life is to be seen.
What I want to say is that seeing yourself is the best seeing.
Don't pin your own excellence on the evaluation of others, but perceive your own excellence.
That is to pay attention to your own changes and be happy for your own growth.
When choosing a job, you can first think about it from the macro perspective of the industry, company, and position.
Make sure that your choice of general direction is correct.
Before, I never thought about these things.
Just use the number of people in the company to measure whether the company is good or not.
In my stereotype, I would think that a big company means stability.
However, from the policy changes in the education industry in 2021, and the layoffs due to the epidemic in 2022.
It made me deeply realize that apart from my own personal company, no company is worth relying on for a long time.
Because many things cannot be determined by micro-individuals, such as the company's business decisions and changes in the external environment.
The real iron rice bowl has never been attached to a company to survive and live.
Instead, rely on one's own ability, self-improvement is ten thousand strong.
From a micro perspective, a job can be considered from three aspects: ability, value, and interest.
Currently, in terms of value.
In fact, what I do may not be of much value to the company.
When I receive a task, I will think about the value of this task to the company and to myself.
Maybe I can make this matter valuable to myself through a change in my attitude.
However, in many cases, due to some systems or restrictions, this matter may have no value at all for the company.
It's a complete waste of resources, but I can't change it.
For example, for a requirement, the demand side requires it to be done, but this requirement may not be useful at all.
The wasted human cost is actually a lot.
The money is borne by the company, so I don't feel distressed.
But if it was my company, my own money, I would be very heartbroken.
Seeing the collapse of the building, but feeling powerless, made me feel tired.
Interest can be changed through your own attitude, and you can find your own interests, and you will become more and more interested.
Ability can also be cultivated in practice, but value is really too difficult.
In the workplace, involuntarily.
In 2023, I hope that I can build my own knowledge system according to the KF4D model that Cao Jiang mentioned in the book "Efficient Learning".
In terms of motivation, my current motivation mainly comes from three aspects.
I hope I can work with the end in mind.
- Work is a good place to practice and develop your own abilities
- Work is the experimental field of methodology, through practice, form your own methodology
- Create value for the company, at the same time, maintain their own living needs
In terms of traits, you need to know more about yourself and know yourself.
Before, I didn't know what I needed and why I worked.
In terms of experience, sort out your past work and internship experience to explore your own direction.
My inner expectation is to make a valuable product, a small and beautiful product, which can help and influence a small number of people.
Let these people undergo good changes and become better selves.
At present, content products and tool products are both a good entry direction.
In terms of capabilities, we hope to do the following in 2023:
- Find a job you like (unemployed)
- According to different career stages, make different ability models, compare the ability models, and improve yourself in a targeted manner
- Thinking from the perspective of the workplace life cycle, it includes large cycles and small cycles. The big cycle refers to the planning of a lifetime of work. The current plan is to work for seven years and then look at it. A small cycle is a cycle of work, including resumes, interviews, entry, work, promotion, resignation, and review. From the perspective of this small cycle, build a knowledge system for job hunting and work.
- Process-based, template-based, list-based, and customary: sort out the large product workflow framework and each sub-process under the framework.
- Methodology Precipitation: Precipitate the learned and practiced methodology in the form of words.
- Summary of work principles (values): As a work guideline, better guide work and avoid mistakes
5. Family life
This place of peace of mind is my hometown.
Maybe it's because I grew up with my grandpa.
I am a person who is more dependent on my family, but I am ashamed to express my emotions.
The family members I understand include grandparents, parents, siblings, partners, and children.
In 2023, I hope that I will start small and cherish family time, including:
- call home more
- Buy some food and things to send back
- Know how to show weakness, treat family members without resistance, be more understanding and tolerant
- Take more pictures, save time
The child wants to support but the relative does not wait, the tree wants to be quiet but the wind does not stop.
Don't repay the kindness of upbringing just thinking of becoming famous. It is a better way to start with small things.
6. Learning and growth
Making yourself better is the key to solving all problems.
In a previous conversation, the leader asked me what I believe in?
I said I believed in myself, only to be called too confident.
I don't think it's too confident, on the contrary, it's a positive attitude.
Self-improvement is ten thousand strong, this is a truth that I need to remember.
To learn this word, it should be broken down into two parts.
Learning refers to input, and Xi refers to practice, that is, output.
Learning is the unity of knowing and doing.
Only on this basis can we bring about change, that is, growth.
Combining is learning and growing.
In 2023, in terms of learning and growth, the most important thing is to build your own knowledge system.
In terms of input, it can be carried out from reading, stealing teachers, listening to lectures, practicing, etc. Everything is the object of learning.
In terms of output, the output revolves around four aspects: digital garden, knowledge system, product manager, and knowledge planet.
The matter of learning and growing requires quantitative changes to cause qualitative changes.
So be patient and send a paragraph to yourself:
Don't expect to make obvious, rapid progress; instead, look for small steps each day.
When you make one progress, the others follow, and that's the only way to make progress.
7. Experience breakthrough
A person's life is always looking for stability while looking forward to change.
In 2022, tried ukulele and fishing.
In 2023, I hope that I will continue to be curious and explore the world.
Being a product manager is inherently curious and open-minded.
Bravely embrace change and be exposed to new things.
At the macro level, you can try more previously unknown things, such as developing a new hobby.
At the micro level, you can try some small changes, such as going out for a walk on weekends, going camping, etc.
Try a different way of life, so that life is full of life, not lifeless.
8. Leisure and entertainment
Life is not only meaningful, but also interesting!
In the past, my understanding of leisure and entertainment was superficial "do what you need to do, and play what you need to play".
But I don't think so now. I think good leisure can also be created, not consumed.
For example, if you watch a drama relaxedly on weekends, you can record your feelings and touches while watching the drama.
Use it to guide your life and make it richer.
In 2023, I hope that I will do less consuming things, such as endlessly watching short videos.
Do things that are relaxing but creating value.
For example, reading and writing are a kind of rest for me.
However, you can also try more types.
After all, "Life is not only meaningful, but also interesting!"
Nine. Summary
In fact, the idea of writing this summary came about because I read this article from People’s Daily [Night Reading] 20 small things you can do in the last 20 days of 2022 .
Write a letter to yourself, calm down and have a conversation with yourself, and read it again next spring, and you will definitely have new feelings at that time.
No matter how I write it, I finally wrote the first annual summary of my life.
In this summary, I am more talking to myself.
While looking back on the past year, we are also thinking about the year ahead.
Although the plan is not specific enough, it is for the coming year.
Finally, I have a little hope, instead of spending every day in a daze.
Where there is hope, there is hope.
Of all things, hope is the most beautiful.
The most beautiful things never wither.
In 2022, my theme is change. There are too many changes, and vitality is born in the changes.
For example, the work department changed in August, for example, the epidemic situation was released, for example, I was laid off by the company in December.
For another example, in December 2021, I fell out of love.
We cannot change the external environment, but we can change our mentality.
Embrace change actively and let yourself be the certainty in the change.
In 2023, my key word is habit.
I hope that I can cultivate more good habits, practice long-termism, and habitualize my goals.
For this reason, I also wrote a special article Life Meditation｜Issue 14｜How to practice long-termism · Yuque .
90% of happiness in life is determined by good habits.
There is only one difference between "successful people" and "unsuccessful people", and that is that once successful people discover a good habit in others, they immediately make it their own.
People are shaped by habits, excellent results come from good habits, not temporary actions.
Finally, I would like to send four sentences to myself, hoping that in 2023, I will reflect on myself from time to time.
We always overestimate what we can do in one or two years and underestimate what we can do in five or ten years.
How you live your day determines how you live your life.
Don't expect to make obvious, rapid progress; instead, look for small steps each day.
When you make one progress, the others follow, and that's the only way to make progress.
No one can think clearly at the beginning, only after doing it, the goal will become clearer and clearer.
Concentrate on the goal, have a peaceful mind, and die every day.
No matter how 2022 goes.
In 2023, you still have to live bravely, enthusiastically, and sincerely.
Hello, 2023!
Hello, 26-year-old classmate Xiao Feng!
Let us work together to become a better version of ourselves!