Cai Kangyong: The way of speaking

If you talk too much, you will lose, and disaster will come out of your mouth! 

Some things can only be done, not said; some things can only be thought, not said. Once these things are spoken out and put on the table, they may answer the old saying that disasters come out of the mouth. 
"Long arrogance" and "too much talk" have been strictly guarded against by gentlemen since ancient times, and they are also of reference to today's workplace people. Basically, there are two kinds of "talking about" that can get you into trouble. One is to say the unspoken rules, and the other is to say what is in the heart. 

Unspoken rules 

     In May 2010, German President Koehler resigned for "saying the wrong thing". What he said was: "A country like Germany that relies on foreign trade should know that, if necessary, military means should be used to ensure the smooth flow of trade channels." Koehler is telling the truth, but this truth is an unspoken rule of economic aggression. Since then, everyone has been doing it, but they can't say it. 
The lesson of the Koehler incident to the workplace could not be more obvious. The unspoken rules of the workplace are everywhere: all your credit belongs to the boss, what the boss needs most is not the most capable person, what the boss cares most about is not the interests of the company but how long he can sit in his position, cronyism is one thing. This kind of normality, the wood show will be destroyed by the forest wind... For these unspoken rules, you just need to understand them carefully, don't be smart and sigh. Former Japanese Prime Minister Yasuo Fukuda was also forced to resign because of " 

speaking the wrong thing". In September 2008, Japanese Prime Minister Yasuo Fukuda, who had been in office for less than a year, announced his resignation. The reason for his resignation is that, in an interview, he said: "You said that my speech sounds emotionless, but I can reflect on myself objectively. I am different from you." , with obvious personal sentiments, sparked an upsurge in national discussions, and eventually led to the resignation of Yasuo Fukuda. In all fairness, Yasuo Fukuda has reason to think that he is different from others, and everyone has reason to believe that he is different. But putting this kind of inner talk on the table makes people uncomfortable. It seems that Yasuo Fukuda's own status has caused him to have a certain sense of superiority, and this sense of superiority annoys ordinary people. There are also some inner thoughts in the workplace, which can only be understood and cannot be expressed in words. Once put on the table, there are also side effects.





The first words in my heart: "I am only loyal to my professional ideal" 

      There is only one kind of loyalty that the company wants, that is, no matter what the company does to you, you must take the company's interests as the ultimate benefit. There are two types of companies that want to be loyal: 

      One kind of company really cares about its employees, upholds the dignity of employees, gives employees the remuneration they deserve, and provides generous benefits... Such a company exchanges loyalty for sincerity. Such companies are exceptional and not universal. 
A kind of company is all about making a profit, asking employees to work overtime, to give up vacations, and to work harder... Such a company seeks loyalty through harshness. When employees want a little return, the company looks embarrassed or even angry. This is the common case for companies. 
Excluding the lucky few who can enter the first type of company, for most employees, one-way loyalty has no starting point. In order to grow and survive, employees can only rely on their career ideals to support themselves, work hard and contribute to each work platform, and exercise and grow at the same time. Therefore, true loyalty should be loyalty to one's own professional ideals. 
This sentence must not be easy to come by, and those who have not experienced the blow will not understand it. But loyalty is too high-profile, so it's better to be low-key and safe. 

The second thought in my heart: "I deserve it!" 
Imagine that at the company's year-end meeting, you were commended for your outstanding performance. You took the stage to accept the award, and said excitedly that your long-term efforts have finally been affirmed... 
Everyone I know, you are speaking from your heart, but the result is that the supervisor is not happy, does his guidance to you make no sense? Colleagues are unhappy, isn't teamwork important? Company leaders are not happy, is the company's strategy incorrect? People in other departments are unhappy, can the support of the collaboration department be ignored? 
You don't need to thank the country first, but you must not just thank yourself. 

The third thought in my heart: "You can't make true friends in the workplace!" 
This may be a fact, and everyone understands it in their hearts. But when you feel emotional about this, you will only be considered a young child and not worth taking seriously.
Regarding friends, any rational and mature workplace person understands three truths: First, true friends are hard to find, but friends are indispensable. Individual heroes who fight alone will inevitably fall into isolation. In the workplace, they need "one hero and three gangs". ; Second, making friends in the workplace is like opening an emotional account. Every interaction between people is like depositing and withdrawing money. Balance of income and expenditure is very important for everyone in the workplace. Third, among workplace friends, the component of interest The less, the higher the purity of the friend, and there is nothing else to ask for. 
Now you know that when you seek true friends in the workplace, you are the one who made the mistake at the beginning. Four things in your 

heart: "I don't care" 
Maybe you really don't care, work is just a pastime, and a position is just a decoration. But as long as you're still in the workplace, don't say you don't care. 
You have to care about your salary so that your boss can control you, you have to care about your position, so your boss can motivate you, you have to care about other people's opinions, so your colleagues can talk about you behind your back, you have to care about performance appraisal, so you can be positive, you have to care The interests of the company are enough to be professional... When everyone is satisfied, no one really cares whether you care in your heart or not. 
If you don't care in your heart, it is your inner steadfastness and pride. If you don't care about your mouth, it will be interpreted as hypocrisy or childish. 

The fifth thought: "This is not fair!" 
Is this world fair? The answer is no, everyone on earth knows it. Blindly pursuing fairness in the workplace is not only unrealistic, but also more likely to be disgusting. 
Sexism, seniority, cronyism, cronyism, doing more and getting less... How many other injustices have you not experienced? The more you resist injustice, the more you will encounter injustice, the world will never be a better place, it's all about how you feel in your heart. 
The world is not fair, but you can. Within the scope of your own authority, you must do things fairly as much as possible, and don't expect others to be fair when it comes to rewards. 
Do what you want, just let it flow, and you'll be better off. 

     Finally, I thought of a sentence to share with everyone, "Before you speak, you are the master of words, and after you speak, you are the servant of words."