Zeng Shiqiang--Emotion Management Study Notes--Chinese People Need Emotion Management Most

The first period Chinese people need emotional management most

1. What is emotion? Emotions are nothing good or bad. Emotions are a reflection of our environment .

2. What is the environment? The outside world is the environment, we are also the environment, and we ourselves are also an environment for ourselves. Internal, external, visible, invisible, any changes will make us have a reflection. And this reflection is called emotion.

3. Reflected, this does not matter whether it is good or bad.

4. What is emotional management? There must be methods for management. There is no specific method not called management. Management must be effective. If it is still ineffective after a long time, it is not called management. Therefore, management not only has to propose specific methods, but if you follow them and practice more, you will surely receive good results.

5. Not only can emotions be managed, but they are more autonomous than other things, because they don’t have much to do with others, and it’s entirely your own decision. Emotion is a kind of your own reaction, you can control and manage it.

6. The mood of the Chinese has changed greatly:

   1. People all over the world have emotional ups and downs, and the Chinese have changed greatly;

   2. It sounds nice, alertness is very high, any disturbance will have an impact;

   3. It's hard to say, and the suspicion is very heavy. Whenever you start to doubt it, then react.

7. Believing at the beginning is actually very reckless and very sorry for myself.

8. In Chinese society, you must be very careful when speaking. Different ways of expression may bring about different effects.

9. The Chinese are easy to get angry because we are too sensitive . People obviously don't mean this, but you can hear a lot of meanings. This has nothing to do with good or bad, as I just said: Today I want to talk to you, instead of saying that I want to chat with you, now many people like to use chat, (where are we If you have time to chat with you), chat means that your stuff is not mature at all, so you can talk about it. Talking about it will not work. This is a very solemn subject. Let’s talk about it. So I use this to speak words. But some people say, I want to teach you this time, it's even worse, what do you teach, and what qualifications do you have to teach others?

10. Each sentence causes different emotional reactions. But we usually rarely pay attention to these. We at least said, don't beat people, don't irritate people, we didn't expect to say that as soon as you open your mouth, different reactions will come out. So: Be careful when speaking, be careful when speaking, and pay special attention to the use of words. I can’t say just what I like.

11. If you decide to move, you will change later.

12. Chinese people lose their temper easily

    1. We always think that others should not treat me like this, it is really unfair;

    2. Our self-esteem is not allowed to be underestimated, how can we look down on me?

    3. We also like to make the decision on our own, and many people just like to push me around.

13. What is fairness? Westerners believe that everyone is the same as fairness. The Chinese are only me special and fair.

14. When a Westerner speaks, you have to listen to his content, while a Chinese speaker does not need to listen to the content.

15. The Chinese are not afraid of the sky or the earth, but they are afraid that they will look down upon it.

16. When the Chinese are angry, he is totally unreasonable. The Chinese are the most reasonable people in the world, and all the truths have been explained by the Chinese. But sometimes, he is unreasonable, that is, when you make him angry, he is unreasonable. When the Chinese are emotionally stable, he is more reasonable than anyone else. When it is unstable, it is less reasonable than anyone else.

17. Emotional debt creates ourselves: we are our own creation

    1. Various life experiences have made me who I am today, and I cannot escape;

    2. The emotional legacy of childhood becomes our earliest, innocent debt;

    3. Constantly suppressing my emotions, but feeling more and more uneasy, how!

18. You find a way to stabilize the other person's emotions, and again, it works. You go straight ahead, just talk about it when you meet, he is so hot, nothing is useful.

19. Depressed or poorly controlling emotions

    1. Let emotions dominate everything about us, the consequences are likely to be very serious;

    2. Therefore, I tried my best to suppress and control, which resulted in unexpressed pressure;

    3. The absence of emotion does not mean that there is no emotion, and it is waiting to break out.

20. When we do anything, we must first handle our emotions before you talk about other things, so that it will have an effect. Me: I think this is the same for others, first handle the emotions, and then talk about other things, the effect should be better.

21. The conclusion of this unit of ours is: To cultivate yourself and settle down, on the one hand, you have to deal with your emotions well, on the other hand, you have ways to stabilize the other person’s emotions. (You are stable and others are unstable. His words may also stimulate you and make yourself angry, so you should also consider other people’s emotions and speak carefully.) Chinese people are in good mood, everyone is reasonable, and then, soon There is a tacit understanding, which is easy to discuss. If everything has a consensus, it will be easy to handle. Don't worry, first establish a consensus, and consensus is difficult to establish. It must be that everyone is in a good mood, and when they are in a bad mood, he will not listen to what you say, and what consensus he has established with you. Only then can you understand why management is called: Xiu Ji An Ren.

22. Cultivating oneself is to stabilize one's emotions. Once you become unstable, others will also become unstable, and it will be messy. An Ren is to make the other party's emotions stable. Everyone is stable and easy to discuss .

23. The logic of teacher Zeng Shiqiang’s lecture is quite clear: in the process of explaining, he cited a lot of examples and some basic conclusions. Although there is no rigorous reasoning, it does not necessarily say that it is applicable to everyone, but this situation does exist in life. Yes, through the study of this course, we can also better understand the various situations in life (open up a new angle and perspective), and then control some of our control and realize value. It is recommended to take a look at https://www.bilibili.com/video/BV1mE411R71f  because there are some cases in it, and the combination of learning is quite profound.

24. Self summary:

    1. I had consciously read the book "Emotion Management" by Mr. Zeng before, but there was no unity of knowing and doing. I remember that because I was emotional, I did not control my emotions, and did two things that I would regret and sad forever. One turned my good friend into a separated friend, and the other turned my girlfriend into an ex-girlfriend. . Here, first of all, I have acquired this emotional management cognition, and there are so many real cases in my life, so I should know how to do it, cultivate oneself, and how to do it, I will continue to learn in the following courses. Most of the above notes are excerpts from watching the video. I hope I can apply what I have learned and urge myself to improve my emotional cognition and management.

    2. Once you have acquired this knowledge, then the next step is to practice, to cultivate yourself and to calm yourself down, do not rush in the early stage, reach a consensus, use caution in your speech , and you will be more smooth in the later stage.